X Factor Drinking Game
I’ve always been a grumpy X Factor hater, convinced it was stultifying, brain-murdering dross designed to sedate the ignorant, drooling masses.
It turns out I was wrong, and it’s actually fucking brilliant. Now I find the smug Twitter-enabled bleating of those “too cultured” to enjoy it indicative of a certain mean-spiritedness: what precisely do these armchair critics find so objectionable, the quests for glory, the honor of the competition, or music itself?
Of course they don’t have any more objection than I did, what they mean is:
EVERYONE IS TALKING ABOUT IT BUT I DON’T UNDERSTAND IT AND I FEEL REALLY LEFT OUT*
Anyway, to celebrate the fact that it’s actually terrifically compelling, I’ve turned it into a drinking game.
(Cher to win, obviously.)
*Unfortunately I can’t readily apply this wisdom to my other dislikes, so I’ll continue to bleat ineffectually that Dr Who is a badly written, glibly acted and terribly produced KIDS SHOW with insufferable pretentions, that, while inexplicably delighting people I otherwise respect, makes me literally embarrassed to be British; and The Apprentice, a show so dripping in cynicism you could fry an egg in it, is a damning indictment of a dysfunctional capitalist culture that should more properly be titled AMSTRAD: TWATS WANTED.
